#37 the BEST Birthday....Yet!

Getting older is something that I honestly have LOVED.

I feel:

Wiser
Closer to the Lord
Closer with Jay
My marriage is better
More confidence in Motherhood
Family time is sweeter
Friendships are dearer

Cherry planed the best friend party for me! Since my love language is quality time I loved hanging out with some local girl friends. We ate at Market Place Grill, Callie, made my favorite -Strawberry Shortcake plus, I got a free Chocolate Mess! The food, friends, dessert and conversation was perfect but what meant the most was the creative way they shared what I mean to them.

In the center of the table were all different colors of daisies. Since I LOVE flowers this was very beautiful to me. Tucked into each pot was a tissue paper flower. Cherry opened up one and read:

“The language of flowers, sometimes called floriography, was a Victorian-era means of communication in which various flowers and floral arrangements were used to send coded messages, allowing individuals to express feelings which otherwise could not be spoken. I am not always best with words, so I thought I’d let the flowers speak for themselves.

The flower symbolism associated with the daisy is purity, innocence, loyal love, patience and simplicity…all of which are descriptions of you, Melissa! Today we celebrate you and praise God for bringing you onto this earth. You have made an impact in our lives and I believe we all count you not only a friend but a sister.

Romans 12:9-13 ‘Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil, cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Hone one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.’

I have seen all of this displayed in you at one time or another. We praise God for you and have learned so much from you!

With Love Always,

Cherry M.”

The next morning I opened the rest of the tissue paper flowers and read the following with tears in my eyes:

Back Row: Amy Gaddy, Molly Kiltworth, Cherry Martinez, Marla Rusack, Heather Richards, Callie Granderson
Front Row: Ruth Epstein & ME! Angela Story not pictured but there in spirit!

“Oh, gosh, it is hard to sum up Melissa and what she means to me in one short paragraph. I started to make a list of all of her shining attributes, but there were so many it looked like I just copy and pasted a list of positive character traits. HA! First thoughts, Melissa is a really good friend. Not only to me but to almost anyone she encounters! There is not telling how many women that would consider Melissa to be in their “T-5” (top five) friends. She is an excellent friend. She truly, truly cares about people. One of the qualities that make her such a good friend is that she is a ridiculously good- listener. Not only that, but she also gives wise and practical advice and she is patient when you first don’t take her advice.;) haha! She is gifted in counseling other. People feel comfortable sharing with her because she is trustworthy and honest. She has been a mentor and role-model to dozens of you girls, women and new moms. J  She is so selfless and generous with her time and talents. What an impact she has! Not to mention she is an awesome wife and mother. She sets and example for both a Christ-centered marriage and Christ-centered parenting. She is a very genuine, authentic, woman of God. Melissa could also write a book or teach a class on arts and crafts/home-Ec. She is so resourceful! I have learned and adapted many of her house-hold/home-keeping/domestic tricks. I sometimes refer to her as my “Martha Stewart.” (Martha before she was incarcerated). I laughed out loud here! Melissa and I have gotten to share some fun memories, the most special being the birth of Jack Mitchell. J

Callie Granderson”

“Here is my story:

Fall 2008: Noah is telling me I have to take him to this Pumpkin Caring Party for his fried, JT. And I’m supposed to bring soup! We get on the road and I ‘m not believing how far I ‘m driving! I’m driving up the mountain and get the end of the road and I’m still driving!!! But that night was special, combing family and friends, soup, pumpkin carving, games and the giant fire! The view was breath-taking from your front porch! And I loved talking with you, Melissa! I love you and our friendship. Anytime we get together, I love hearing what God is doing in your life, your marriage and your family! You share what God is teaching you! Thank you! You are generous, kind, wise and beautiful! Thank you for being you! I treasure more time with you in the future!!!

Love, Ruth”

“When I think of you, Melissa, I see you smiling. Your sweetness and sense of humor are two things that drew me to you when we met. It is obvious that you the Lord and are yielding to him. You are committed to your husband and kids. I hear you speak with kindness and grace. And you are full of wisdom. Steady and level-headed come to mind as well. I’m glad you have a little “crazy” streak- another thing that drew me to you! J I am privileged to know you, just this short time, and look forward to more years of friendship!

Happy Birthday! Love You!
Marla Rusack”

“Dear Melissa,

I can still remember the first time I met you. We were about to move into Woodway and were spending some time there with the Gaddy’s. Michael and Amy wanted to drop by and say hello to the Gresham’s. “They’re a bit older than us, say upper 30’s but they’re so cool!” Michael informed us. He was right. You are so cool, Melissa. But, you’re so much more than that. I remember you being so warm and welcoming, even to strangers. I think you already had dinner guests over, but welcomed us on in. I love your “the more the merrier” mentality. In a room full of multiple conversations, I ended up sitting right next you and we had our own. You told me your story and how God led your family to Woodway. Then you told me something I’ll never forget. It has encouraged me and inspired me ever since. “Don’t feel the need to have that American ‘cookie-cutter’ life. Don’t by a house, settle down, and plant your roots UNLESS GOD tells you to. And if he doesn’t, then don’t. And that is ok.” J Such simple words, yet so bold and powerful. When I think of you I see an elephant. It stands for power and wisdom. I love these things about you because they come straight from the Lord. You accept the gifts with such grace and poise. From the obedient way you homeschool your kids, to the love way you raise them-from the organized way your run your household, to the hospitable way you open it- I am inspired. From Bighouse, to New Heights, to Africa- God is using you in beautiful way. When Ryan and I think about our family one day…we think about The Gresham’s. J We see and love so many things about your family that we desire for our one day too. Though we don’t get to spend as much time together as I wish, your life has been a light to mine. Thank you for being a wonderful neighbor, friend and sister in Christ.

Oh! And P.S. Did I forget to mention how TOTALLY excited I am for what God is doing with your family in Africa?!?! Ryan and I are in love with Africa and its people. So cool to see you guys faithfully following that dream.

Happy Birthday Melissa!

Sincerely,
Molly Elizabeth Klintworth”

“Melissa

What a blessing you have been in my life over the past few years! You have such wisdom in many areas of life from childbirth and raising kids to cooking tips! Michael and I appreciate the example you and Jay have set by choosing to live differently and with purpose. Thanks for serving me so much through offering advice and wisdom. I hope you have a great birthday this year and feel loved!

Amy”

“Melissa,

You’ve made and incredible impact on my life. Watching you from “afar”-living out being a wife, a mother, a daughter of the Most High.

I’ve learned from you that it’s always best to:

Seek God’s wisdom above all else
Think like a man (I laughed out loud here, I am glad it is working!)
Find humor even in the difficult things in life

The reassuring feel of your hand on the nape of my neck as I labored with the birth of my first born taught me: A silent, humble, prayerful spirit of a servant is incredibly powerful
Peace
Surrender to God’s precious gifts admits trials
I’ve learned so much from you.
Your spirit Glows.
Your laughter is contagious.

Thank you for imparting yourself to me: your wisdom, your friendship, your “sisterhood” in Christ.

You are much to celebrate!

Love,
Heather”

“Melissa-

The dictionary defines the word friend as someone who values someone else and the bible says that friends love at all times. You are a perfect picture of friendship. Thank you for always being so willing to love on us throughout good times and bad. Thank you for showing other what unconditional love is and what listening without judgment looks like. Thank you that you have always been a shoulder for me to cry on and the friend I can’t wait to tell my greatest joys to. Thank you for loving my boys as if they were members of your family and for teaching them with kindness and affection. Thank you for your encouragement to ALWAYS be looking to God for answers and NOT to the world. Thank you for loving Jesus so fervently. Thank you for being so generous and hospitable. Thank you for sharing life with me! My family values and appreciates you more than you know. I love you and am very thankful that the Lord gave me a friend in you. I look forward to many more years of friendship with you. There is no greater love than this.

Love you,

Angela and the Story brood J”

I was overwhelmed reading all of these letters. I thought, “I am not this person…I am selfish, greedy, irritable & weak!” Then God spoke over me: “Yes, you are, but when you live in me when you let me fill you up and use you I am able to work through you so that you can be what your friends see. There is nothing good in you, Melissa, but me!” Wow! This is so incredibly true. I am so humbled that Jesus calls me friend. That He wants to use me to show His love. On this 37^th birthday I feel so loved!

“Thank you Jesus for giving me life! Thank you for allowing me to grow up with Christian parents who taught me about you. Thank you for all of the mentors you have place in my life at the right moments so that I could be challenged to grow deeper in love with you. Thank you for a loving husband and for the amazing children you have given me, even the two that I wasn’t allowed to raise. They have taught me so much about trust, timing, and the hope of heaven.  Thank you for always blessing with sweet friends at every stage in my life. Thank you for loving me through the really hard times, for being patient with me when I didn’t trust you, or believe that my broken heart was for my own good. Lord, show me this year all the places in my heart I haven‘t not given to you. Fill them up so that I can, in return, show your love to those you put in my path.”

Happy Birthday to Me!

Whoo Hoo! Jay is Graduating!

Well, the time has come, I am proud to say that  4:30 mornings and 9:30 pm study sessions are behind us, for now! We couldn't have made it the past 18 month without God. He was our strength, edurance and peace.  I am very proud of your hard work and dedication, Honey.

You have worn many hats while in nursing school yet, you continued to score very well on all of your

tests, make time for me and the kids, plus mentor teens! I am so proud of you my husband and best friend for working hard and not giving up in the tough times. 

Notes from some friends & family:

So proud!  So proud!
Blessings,
Andrea
Jay and Melissa- congrats on the accomplishment. We know you both have sacrificed so much and God (plus us) is/are proud of all you guys have done. We pray that your trip to Africa will be productive and special! Sorry we won't be there to see your pinning but we will be with you in spirit!
Love,
Gerald and Lori

Way to Go Jay!!!  

Congrats!
Rohnda

So exciting!  Can't believe that this day is finally here.  I feel like time flew by even though it felt like it never would.  We are very proud of Jay too!  That is also a good picture of Jay.  :)  Nurse Jay, ya look sharp in your scrubs!  I like to be at monumental events, but we are actually leaving for Florida that evening.  Corey will be around still.... he's flying out the next day I think... so he might get to be there!  I am celebrating in spirit though!
Callie


Yes!!!!  We are sooo happy and proud of you!!
 LOVe YOU,
Kevin and Penny

Woopie Jay, congratulations. I am so proud of you. I know it has been very hard for you and Melissa but as the bible says I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. God bless you and continue to follow His leadership and He will never forsake you or lead you astray. 
Love ya Grandma

I am very proud of his accomplishments and your continued ongoing support and encouragement that has been given him! You both make me proud!!! It actually brings tears of joy to my eyes. You guys were made for each other!! 
Love,
Dad/James

NICE!!!! Good pic too! 
Congrats!
Micheal Gaddy

Well, you have every right to be proud...we're very proud too and plan to be there for both ceremonies.  But I'm not at all surprised at how Jay has excelled, impressed and impacted.  He has always thrown his whole being into whatever he's attempted...and I wouldn't have it any other way! 
Love, Mom/Connie

Very proud of both of you.  I know it was a team effort.  Way to go Jay!!!!!!

Larry 

Congrats!!!!
Mark Greenway

Wow!!  Whoo hoo! I hope to be there!!  Praise God!!
 Keith

A Time for Change

As many of you know, January 2011, I was accepted into nursing school. Melissa and I both knew God was putting tension on our lives again in the same way he did when I quit AT&T to start Bighouse in 2006. When applying for nursing school our prayer was, “Lord, help us glorify you most.” We desired to continue working at Bighouse if that was going to glorify him most, but if his plan was for me to pursue nursing then I would get accepted into the program. Out of 300 applicants that applied, I was one of the 50 that were chosen. God had answered and we knew we were facing another transition so that He could be glorified.

 This spring finds us on the tail end of this transition. We have had some challenges. Melissa, along with extra volunteers, has taken on a bigger role in the day to day operation of Bighouse so that I can continue with my nursing education. We believe God is going to use my medical training to help the poor of  East Africa. We had no idea where God was eventually leading us when we stepped out in faith to open Bighouse, but we now see that he was preparing us for this moment.

Opening Bighouse was an act of obedience, and in keeping with our call to be obedient and to glorify him, we know God is asking us to get prepared for the next step in our journey, full time medical mission work overseas. God’s command to care for the orphans and widows has been stamped on our hearts in a way that can’t be ignored.  (James 1:27)

“For I was hungry and you fed me. I was thirsty , and you have me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me….I assure you, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you were doing it to me!”                                                   Matt. 35-36; 40

In 2006 it was this verse that propelled us to open the doors of Bighouse and our hearts to the teens of Prairie Grove. In 2012 it is this verse that propels us toward the needs in East Africa. All the while we have been privileged with the opportunity to fed, clothe, visit, and love many teens. As I have looked over past newsletters I have been overwhelmed with God’s goodness. So many teens have come, so many prayers answered and so many who have invested their time and resources into Bighouse.

I will be graduating from nursing school in June and then starting to gain medical experience by working full time as a nurse to prepare me for overseas work. Melissa and I will be stepping down as directors of Bighouse as of May 31st.  We will continue to receive donation through May 31st. Your continued financial support through the month of May is very important so that we can wrap up all the expenses of the program while still providing a place for the teens to come until school is out.
It is with very mixed emotions that this letter has been written. We have so many wonderful memories, we have met so many incredible teens, and  have worked alongside so many incredible people. When we think on these things our hearts feel heavy because we will miss these times. God continues to reminded us over and over that Bighouse isn’t ours, it belongs to him. He gave us the idea, He has provided the money, the building, the teens etc… and He will continue to provide for the teens of Prairie Grove because they belong to Him and are dear to His heart.

I humbly thank you,
                   Jay Gresham

We have recieved so many encouraging emails since sending out this newsletter. I have decided to record them here so they we can rember all the good things God has done and continues to do.

Wow! I wasn't expecting news like this, but I think you're starting out on an incredibly exciting time in your lives.

I'm so proud that I was able to be a little part of the beginning of Bighouse. You all have made it into such a tremendous success that our whole community is proud of, and I know that every kid that's walked through the door down there has been touched by your love, support, and generosity. Wherever you end up you'll do great things for the people there, too!

Love, Susan

What a great letter.  My heart goes out to you and Jay and what a blessing you guys have been for the community.  Your going to be missed.  

May God Continue to bless you and your family  Donna

Congratulations on nursing school, Jay.  Much love to you both.  Prayers for your new journey.

Love yall- Shannon

Good luck to you both!  Thank you so much for your much appreciated work you put into Devon and the girls!  May God bless you both.

Praise God for what He has done, for what He is doing, and for what He is going to do in the lives of the Gresham family.  What an incredible Christian example you are!  Love you all!
Blessings,
Andrea

Wow, so blessed by your friendship and your passion for those in need, wherever you are!!! Love, Laura 

jay and melissa - i'm so excited for you both!  congrats on your upcoming graduation and i'll be "thinking" about you both throughout these next few months of transition.  and if you decide that east africa isn't the place for you, you can always come join me at the hospital here in ch!na!!  :-)

loves,
-a
Jay and Melissa,
    It is sure sad to hear that you are leaving, but rejoice in the direction you are heading and wish you all the best.  Thank you for all that you have done for our community and please let me know if I can ever help you in the future.
Thanks,
Rudy

We are proud of you all and support your decision!  God always knows what is best!

Love,
Kayla and Augie

 

Special Acknowledgements:

David Parks– Thank you for helping us from the beginning take our vision & put it into action. Thank you for your listening ear and friendship.  You were such an encouragement to us all along the way.
Keith & Resha Childress– Thank you for being “cheerful givers”. You have been thoughtful , encouraging and your timing was always a God thing. We love you guys!
Larry Oelrich– Thank you from day one! You were so helpful to us. Your vision for the community is inspiring and you were always more than willing to do whatever was needed. We needed that encouragement to keep going!
Rudy & Cindy Timmerman–  God has gifted you with the spirit of giving and we were so blessed and humbled by your willingness to jump in and provide for the needs of Bighouse. Thank you for your friendship. JT and Claira-  Our children, you have been such troopers. Since you were 5 & 8 years old you have been a part of every trend and phase. Skateboarding, rock-climbing, downhill mountain biking, demolition, renovations, hours upon hours of hanging out with teenagers even before you were one! Thank you for being selfless kids and willing to share your mom and dad with the teens. You’re the  best!
Our Parents, Siblings (this includes our brother and sister-in-law) , Grand parents, Aunts , Uncles & Cousins-Thank you for supporting us verbally and financially. You encouraged us when we were down and got excited with us over the “little stuff”. Thank you for taking deep breaths and praying for us instead of telling us how crazy we are!!! We already know that! We love you all and so proud to have you as family.

Board Members Past and Present*: 

For all the hours of meetings, vision casting, fundraising planning, parking, praying, and meals shared etc..Thank you! None of this would have a happened without the special roles you each played.

*Chris Akey
Doug Allen
*Ken Childress
*Leah Childress
Joe Elledge
Rosie Elledge
Dr. John King
Susan Parks-Spenser
Jennifer Patterson
*James Patterson
Tammy West
Carmen Weaver

I have been hearing many thoughts.....

I’ve been hearing many thoughts come out of Jay’s mouth recently. Things like…..

“Babe, have you seen this website about this RN in Kenya who has opened a hospice center? Maybe the Lord wants to use us there?”
“Guess what…only 17 more weeks until graduation, then I will officially be an LPN!!”
“Babe, I have three tests tomorrow, I have no idea how I will do.”
“Guess what, I made 88%, 84%, 92%. It was all God I have no idea how I did that in one day.”
“Babe, have you been on Restoration Gateway’s Website lately? There are some amazing things going on in Uganda! Maybe the Lord wants to use us there?”

I have been hearing many thoughts come out of Melissa’s mouth recently.  Things like...

“Honey, I heard about this guy, Grant, working in Sudan, they need a male nurse you should check it out. Maybe the Lord wants to use us there?”
“I can’t wait until you’re done with nursing school so that I can see your entire face not just the top of your head while you’re studying!!”
“Honey, trust the Lord he will give you the strength you need to do well on those tests.”
“I read the Huffman’s in Kenya blog today, you need to read it. They have a new nurse helping them at their children’s home.”
“I had a dream of holding a baby who was dying because it needed food.”

As most of you know we are facing a season of change as we navigate through this incredible journey called Life!

We have learned so much through the Bighouse ministry. God has used our time as we have worked with teens who have great emotional need to soften our hearts toward those in great physical need. As we read God’s word, pray, worship, & learn more about needs around the world we continue to be drawn to the needs of East Africa.

This coming July Melissa and I are planning a discovery trip to East Africa to see the work being done by these three organizations. We have been praying for God to show us which organization he desires us to work alongside so that we will be able to look after the orphan and widow to the glory of God.

“What does the Lord require of us: To do justice, to love mercy
and to walk humbly with our God.” Micah 6:8

Please pray for our trip:
-Safety while traveling.
-Safety for JT and Claira while they staying behind, this time.
-Unity and sensitivity to the Holy Spirit.
-Our long term purpose in E. Africa  to be revealed.

Financial Support:

-2 plane tickets $3,000
-2 weeks room & board in Kenya $1,000
-2 weeks room & board in Uganda/Sudan $560
- 4 week van rental $400

Total Trip Cost: $4,960

Mail Tax Deductible Donation To:
New Heights Church

P.O. Box 8668
Fayetteville, AR 72703

*Please write Gresham’s on the memo line.        Thank You!

He has Risen! He has risen, INDEED!

On Saturday I was reminiscing the Easters from my childhood. I remember how excited I was to wake up on Easter morning, put on my beautiful custom dress made by my talented mother that had been taunting me all week long. Then I would go outside to  have a  picture taken with my siblings and then head off to church where we would chant the phrase. The pastor would passionately say, "HE HAS RISEN!" and we would all chant back, "He has risen, INDEED!"

Throughout my childhood  I may have experienced Easter in several different churches but, there were still many things that stayed the same. I still woke up to my hand made dress, had my picture taken with my brother and sister, and then went to church where we would all chant, "He has risen, INDEED!"

What does this mean? This is what I kept thinking about Saturday. I was wondering, "Is it just something we say because it is the "Easter" thing to say?" As I was reflecting on  what Easter  means to me now at this point in my life I realized it is the response to this statement that I have never really taken time to understand.

Yes, Jesus has risen. But, can I say he has risen, INDEED?
in·deed

 /ɪnˈdid/ Show Spelled

adverb

in fact; in reality; in truth; truly
(used for emphasis, to confirm and amplify a previous statement, to indicate a concession or admission)
Yes! I can!
Indeed- he has healed hurts that wounded my heart deeply
Indeed- he allowed me to be raised by parents you taught me the ways of Jesus
Indeed- he showed himself to me at a young age
Indeed- he brought mentors that have shown me his truths
Indeed- he gave me a husband who loves me unconditionally because he seeks the Lord
Indeed- he comforted me when I miscarried and then blessed me with an amazing son, JT, whom I   get to show how to be a follower of Jesus
Indeed- he comforted me, again, when I miscarried and then blessed me with an amazing daughter, whom I get to show how to be a follower of Jesus
Indeed- he has brought light into the very dark places of my life
Indeed- he has showed me that my identity is in Him and not man
Indeed- he place on my heart to give up my materialism so that my time could be spent reaching out to at risk teens through Bighouse (I still struggle with materialism but God is my strength!)
Indeed- he has provided for our financial, medical, transportation, education and housing needs since we have lived on support for the last six and half years
Indeed- he has caused my heart to break because of injustice, to learn to love mercy and to strive to walk humbly with him. (Micah 6:8)
Indeed- he has given me the strength and desire to say, "I am the Lord's servant, and I am willing to accept whatever he wants. " (Luke: 1:38)

Easter Sunday, April 8, 2012. I woke up, put on a skirt that I have owned for five years, meant to take a picture of all of us but didn't because I forgot, can you imagine! We arrived at church early knowing it would be a busy Sunday. I saved four seats but I was unsure that JT would sit with us because he had spent the night before with his friend, Grady. As the music started to play I reflected on the words of the songs. Phrases like... my Redeemer Lives, Every one needs Compassion, Let Mercy Fall etc.. Hearing Claira's voice sing was like standing next to a heavenly angel. JT came and set by me. He hugged me and whispered in my ear that he loved me. When Jay was done with his ushering duties  he came and joined the rest of us.

So, here I was with my husband, who I adore, and my two incredible children, who I had prayed for, at my sides, a rare treat since they are usually in their age appropriate services, and it happened. Our pastor and dear friend, Lee, takes the stage and says passionately, "HE has RISEN!" and we all four reply, "He has risen, INDEED! For the first time in 36 years I was humbled and completely amazing at the phrase.

 Ineed, he has risen!